Updated: Jul 4
Facing The Facts—How Some Relationships Are Toxic
Recognize Your Chakras as Powerful Means of Prioritizing Yourself Without Guilt and Claiming Your Peace￼
Breaking away from any relationship is an arduous task, especially if you have invested time, effort, and resources into that relationship for years. Over time, we can sometimes forget that relationships are meant to invigorate and refresh us rather than limit and traumatize us. No one deserves to live such a life. Toxicity can be from anyone – parents, spouse, siblings, friends, etc.
But no matter how attached you’ve grown, you need to let go of anyone who is hurting you physically, emotionally, and mentally. You can still have a great amazing life after this negative experience if you are willing to make a move and be courageous. But to begin with, let us identify what a toxic relationship looks like. Some signs that you are in a toxic relationship is that your partner/friend/family member is possessive, jealous, or manipulative. It could be that ‘they’ always play the victim (they don’t take responsibility) or they are critical and controlling. They could also be plainly cruel, selfish, and unapologetic and many more. Once you sense any of these abusive traits in your relationship, the first step is to acknowledge this reality. This is the real kicker—the part that most of us have the most trouble with. We love to live in denial. We make excuses. We gladly take on the culpability because that is easier than facing the truth. Only you can stop lying to yourself, which means that ultimately only you are responsible and able to start your own private revolution…your own mutiny against those who would keep you scared, unhappy, and in pain. But don’t worry, you already have all the tools you need!
Using the 1st -5th Chakras, let’s examine how you can peaceably break free, heal, and create an awesome life for yourself (and your children) again. These Chakras include The Root Chakra, The Sacral Chakra, The Solar Plexus Chakra, The Heart Chakra, and The Throat Chakra.
These energy sources contribute to specific areas of your life to give you a wholesome existence. When they are balanced and in alignment, they ensure self-sufficiency, satisfaction, confidence, love, joy, empathy, and positive self-expression.
In this post, we are going to share with you some specific aspects of these Chakras and why understanding and embracing them will equip your Chakras with the requisite strength and inner core to block all negative energies. So, even when you are in a relationship with those who are toxic, you can let go, heal, and take care of yourself minus remorse or blame. So, let’s get started.
Why Chakras Empower You to Break Free
The Root Chakra
This Chakra is the driver of fear or flight. It facilitates self-sufficiency, stability, ambition, and purposefulness. If the source of this emotion is not rooted in yourself, i.e. you are not self-sufficient or you don’t believe in yourself but in an external person, then you are exposing yourself to toxicity.
For example, you’ve had so much belief in and relied upon the affirmations given by the people you love that you’ve grown so dependent on them. When they use it as a carrot and utilize these things as weapons to reward or punish your ‘good’ behavior, then you might have to let the relationship go.
Outsourcing your purpose or relinquishing control over your ambitions and purpose will only end up causing you slow and dehumanizing misery. You are not alone if this is your current situation. But you’ve got to take responsibility for your own life and your own sense of security. You’ve got to be stable within yourself no matter how external forces around you might be raging as a whirlwind.
The Sacral Chakra
The Sacral Chakra basic expression is creativity, self-worth, and sexuality. Self-worth is the feeling that you possess inherent positive qualities. It’s recognizing that you are a creative, smart, and an intelligent being. Self-worth is also known as self-esteem. As much as possible, endeavor not to link your sense of self-worth to the opinions of others.
You might have attached your sense of loveliness or creativity to someone before (as if they are the source of those attributes or as if your positive qualities are only linked to them), but you must realize that you are unique and possess extremely valuable qualities (which you can start to identify as you look back at situations that you perceived yourself as ‘the lesser’ in your relationship). Everyone is born with distinct talent and gifts which makes them beautifully different. It’s vital you stop the train of thought that you ‘need’ them to be enough. It is precisely this mentality that is toxic to your self-care. Reaffirm to yourself that you are strong, creative, loveable, etc. Journaling your strengths and past victories is a good way to reconnect with your energy source.
The Solar Plexus Chakra
This energy is also known as the inner sun. It controls your inner power, your inner peace, and inner attitude. When this energy source is misaligned, you can become depressed, angry, and aggressive. Having a strong emotional connection to a past event or obsessing over how a loved one has wrongly treated you in the past will only impede your healing.
It’s okay to feel the emotion of anger, but you must eventually let it go. Holding on to that negative feeling will delay your healing and recovery. You must not disrespect yourself by holding on to your past and prevent you from following your heart. That’s giving away your power. You cannot surrender to anyone else but yourself (and the powers that reside within you).
The Heart Chakra
Resentment is a poison to the soul. This Chakra is much more intensive for women. Holding on to bitterness for how someone has treated you even after a long time is toxic to your heart. According to the other name of this Chakra, you must remain “unhurt.” This is not saying you shouldn’t express your emotions, but you must open your heart to be able to have other pleasant experiences.
A block in this Chakra clogs up the heart. If your heart is filled with resentment and bitterness, then you will not be able to experience the emotions of joy, love, empathy, compassion, generosity, optimism, and harmony. A good way to prevent a clog in this energy source is to not put demands on other to reciprocate the emotion you give them. This is the primary cause of resentment and bitterness. The universe is abundant enough to find other channels to reciprocate the intensity of your love.
The Throat Chakra
The emotion of positive self-expression. It means you are able to confidently express yourself without seeking the approval of someone or a group of people (or peers). You are a unique being with a special journey on earth. The more you try to please other people to the detriment of your own happiness, the more unhappy you become.
Craving for the approval of a person or society will stop you from living your truth. This is toxic to your existence. This is not to say you shouldn’t trust others or lean on them in your moment of weakness. But when they make you feel you must be dependent on them, or you feel so attached to their approval then you must let them go. No one can give you that approval apart from yourself. You must internally find it within yourself.
Your relationships should be an oasis for you in a world filled with hatred, brutality, and all sorts of negativity. Anything short of this should not be tolerated as you must put a premium on your mental health, harmony, and general wellbeing.
However, this is not a license for you to always be the receiver. Your relationships should be mutually beneficial for all parties involved. This rests on the foundation that your happiness is your sole responsibility. Placing the responsibility for your happiness on anyone other than yourself is unfair and unhealthy to everyone.
Acknowledging the signs of a toxic relationship isn’t easy. We like what we know, who we know, and why we’ve accepted things the way they are. But if we truly want to love ourselves and begin to find our strength and power, then we cannot take the easy route, can we? Thankfully, your Chakras are within you and only need to be called upon to aid and fortify you. Isn’t it time?